hamishmacdeath:

hamishmacdeath:

My mum has always nitpicked and commented harshly on the clothes I wear or how I have my hair. She won’t let me wear tank tops or t-shirts that have too wide a collar because my binder is showing and she won’t even let me not wear a shirt outside.

All of that plus always pointing out things I hate about myself (my stature, /my acne/, my moles) has made me really stressed and anxious about how other people see me, sometimes to the point where I can’t leave the house in fear of what people will judge about me. And it has also given me a stilted view of myself. I hate my body and I hate my face and I’m always scared about going out of my room in the mornings because I don’t know what she’s going to ‘tease’ me about that day.
I see clothes in stores that I would love to buy/wear but I’m too scared to get them because of what my mother might say and am too scared to ask for clothes from her for holidays because I know that she’ll make fun of whatever it is I like.

I thought that’s just what normal parenting was until I got older and met more of my friend’s parents. None of them got the piss taken out of them by their parents. None. And they say how encouraging their mums/dads are about their likes or their clothes and such; that shattered my whole view on how my parents, mainly my mum, reacted to me wearing certain things or liking certian things.

I hate the sinking feeling and the dread and, on some occasions, the nausea that I get whenever I wear a new outfit or a new shirt or something like that. It’s terrifying and horrible for me.

tldr: if your insessant ‘teasing’ or ‘good natured joshing’ or ‘just a joke’s have made your child grow up to hate themselves and being frightened of expressing themselves in whatever way, you’re doing parenting wrong.

This was from awhile ago but is no less relevant or relatable.